We've been on a journey for quite some time. 1 1/2 years to be exact. I don't know that we've reached our destination but it sure feels like we're getting there. A few weeks ago we had a good friend invite us to their church. The original week we were to attend we had to cancel, but the following weekend we managed to get a newborn and 2 adults to a church service and ON TIME. Yes, it truly was a miracle.
We've been to a lot of churches this past year and a half. All of them had the same thing in common: they were not the right fit for us. We knew there had to be something, somewhere here in our new community that had a little "God-shaped hole" for us. We're not jumping into the membership waters yet, but we do have our second visit under our belts and it is feeling good.
Last week I ventured into the "women's Tuesday morning Bible study" crowd. This was a new crowd for me (for obvious reasons), but I have been looking forward to finding camaraderie with other new moms. This group and the material it is studying is refreshing. Honestly. It's not cheesy. It has substance. It's real. And it's full of real women. Real moms. All of us coming together looking for friendship, a listening ear, and wisdom on this little job called motherhood.
Today's topic was on the heart that we should have as mothers. It may not sound as if it's something we should be concerned about, but think about this: we may be able to fool others, but we cannot fool our children. They know our hearts. And here's a fun fact: matters of the heart are mentioned more than 1,000 times in the Old Testament alone. Think God was trying to tell us something important? Kind of like in school when the teacher says, "if I repeat this or write it on the board - it's important."
Even as Gabbie is just 2 1/2 months old, I know she senses when I'm tired or in a hurry. I can only imagine how much more that will be amplified once I have to start verbally disciplining her. Last week we talked about the type of mother God calls us to be. I love this: God calls us to be the type of mother for the child that He gave us. He doesn't call us to be the type of mother that our own mothers were to us, or our mother in laws were, or our best friends. Why? We're married to a different man, we live in a different culture and we're raising a completely different child. Isn't that awesome? If you're a mother you can probably get such relief from this. For me it helps take that guilt that's already building over the million thoughts running through my head at. all. times. all because we're women and we do one thing REALLY well: we compare. You know you're guilty of it. You compare yourself to other women. You compare your husbands to other husbands. You compare your child's development to other children. And it's exhausting to say the least.
So what type of mother. woman. daughter. child. has God called you to be?
Don't think this isn't applicable just because you might not be a mother...yet. Think about how it applies to all of your current relationships. ESPECIALLY as a woman. No man can ever understand the battle going on in our mind. One over our thoughts. Actions. Words. No man can....except for God.